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Posts Tagged ‘hiding from me’

While still uncategorised by DSM, this syndrome includes:
-Conforming to what you think is normal at all costs, almost to the point of obsession.
-The belief that you are not normal, hence you have to pretend that you are. The stronger the pretence the more severe the condition.
-Wanting to be the Persona you think will be loved, accepted and approved by your peers, family and employers.
-Feeling like something is missing from your everyday interactions and you just cannot figure what it is.
-Have a feeling that people are always looking at you.
-Hiding everything that you are, that you think others will not like.

Many of us consciously or unconsciously spend much of our lives trying to be fictionalised versions of ourselves. The version that appears groomed, poised, serene, successful, perfectly put together. The image of a swan comes to mind, gliding beautifully on the waters surface. Yet we do not see the little feet paddling frantically, painfully to maintain that image of perfection.

This may have led to the myth of the swan song. Swans are supposed to be silent all their lives but sing as they die. Is that because they expend so much effort trying look perfect all their lives that they are free and happy enough to sing only as they die?

BTW the swan song myth is false, swans do not sing as they die. But would it not be wonderful if they sang throughout their lives? If their swan songs were an ode to their individuality and uniqueness? What would your swan song be? And whats preventing you from singing it now?

“Sometimes I pretend to be normal but it gets boring, so I go back to being me” Anon

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